Ready when you are God...

Month after month we settled into a routine of meds, shots and ultrasounds. Some months we had too many eggs and we’d have to call off the cycle (too risky for multiples & complications).That was always extremely disappointing and frustrating. Other months our conditions seemed to be ideal but still no babies.  All the while I clung to that fact that I knew there had to be a reason behind all of this. The more time passed the more I noticed that through this difficult time God was becoming a more focused part of our lives.  Upon a more thorough investigation not only was God hugely influencing our daily lives but it was also apparent that He was having an amazing impact on our immediate family & friends. It was/is truly remarkable how God can transform us! Chad and I had extensive discussion on how different our life was compared to just a year or two ago before we started having this intimate relationship with Christ. The simple fact was we were each growing spiritually and it was making us better spouses, friends, son/daughter, brothers/sisters and one day parents. And I guess you could say that was my “Ah ha” moment. It made sense that God wanted to take more time preparing us before we started our family. Now don’t get me wrong these months were not all roses and sunshine. Especially since it seemed that everyone around us were having babies. We were of course genuinely happy for others but I occasionally couldn’t help throwing myself a pity party here and there. No doubt there were some dark days. But as time went on the pity parties were shorter and shorter in length.  I became thankful for the time to grow spiritually and strengthen our marriage, but was still eager to start our parenting journey. So often my prayers consisted of me thanking God but reminding him that we “get it now” and “are ready”.  As if I needed to remind him of anything…LOL. Clearly I still had a lot to learn about patience & God’s perfect timing.  Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope”.